Wednesday, September 29, 2004

living like it's the last night on earth.. or something..

Sorry for the lag in the blog updates. My parents internet is out of order, so I was cut off from the world for awhile. AHHH. cut it out.

First I would like to apologize to anybody who I offended with my out of control drunkeness on Saturday. From what I remember, I had a really fun time. And judging from the pictures, even the parts I don't remember looked kinda fun too. (where did that container of vaseline come from??) Last thing I remember was wishing I had 3 hands instead of 2 so I could hold 2 Heinekens AND do a shot of Jägermeister AT THE SAME TIME. I think that reason exactly is why humans only have 2 hands. It's a safety feature. Like in cars.

I was super happy to see lots of yous out. It makes it a little hard to leave seeing you all out rockin' and rollin', chillin' and killin' and whatnot.. hey man is that your car? Its nice. Is it new? or is it an old one I haven't seen?

Sunday was Christmas ( I got a camera YEE HAW) and my dad, aka Jesus' birthday. Jesus turned 53. And that only happens once in a lifetime, so we went out for dinner with my entire family plus one extra, namely Daniel's girlfriend. She managed to squeeze her way in to a steak dinner somehow... what a weasle.
So after a lovelee dinner.. as we're getting ready to leave, Daniel says, "Let's make like Tom and Cruise" and then Jesse replies, "let's make like a banana and split" and then Corey (the youngest) says "You guys are stupider than a screen door on a submarine" (he may be young, but he does have a point.) As always, I could't help but laugh at their stupid bantering shananigan give us 5 minutes and we'll get us kicked out of ANY restaurant ways..
Suddenly, out of nowhere, my mother yells out.. as she finished her 2nd glass of wine, "Let's make like Paul Coffey and GET THE PUCK OUT OF HERE" (the capital letters indicates that my mother slightly raised her voice, enough for other tables around to take notice of the borderline vulgarity of her expression)
I used to think my mother was so innocent and naive, and now I'm forced to believe that she can whip out puns as if she invented the puckin' things.

Monday I hung out with my dad. He's having some eye problems, so we went to see 3 different doctor dudes. One of them put these eye drops in which dilated his pupils, making him look like he just dropped a couple hits of Ecstacy and/or acid. Or maybe he did some ecstacy while he was in the doctors office you just never know. We went to get his license renewed, and the lady at the registry place gave him the most skeptical look when he told her he wanted to renew his license. She pulled him aside and asked for 2 extra pieces of ID. Then, she got some co-workers to come check him out. Eventually, my dad looked in the mirror and realized his striking resemblance to a candy flipping hippy raver wacked out on a Monday afternoon. He explained the situation. Eventually the lady believed his story and gave him his license. And a sucker. She even gave me a sucker. What a gal. So the moral of the story is, if you're even dropping acid and ecstacy on a Monday afternoon and you need to get your license renewed, just say you got some special drops put in your eyes.. works like a charm. Who said parents don't teach yas anything useful??

Goodbyes are really fun! (read: not fun at all) My favourite part was how people react to somebody crying on the bus. Approximately half ignore it, and the other half just STARE. it's kinda creepy actually..

I think I'm beginning to understand why people don't undertake so many ridiculous overseas adventures as they get older. It's kinda tough putting your life into a little cubby hole (like in Kindergarden where you keep your outdoor shoes and your indoor shoes) and eventually coming back to it. Having left it unattended for 6 months, some shoe thieves could have snuck in during nap time and cut your shoes up and used it to bury in the sandbox. Or it could be perfectly intact. Risky Business. Tough on the old heart strings. But I'm forced to remind myself of a song by Elton John called "crocodile rock" and then I know that everything will be alright.

Tomorrow I'm off the HALIFAX. In the AM. Which is like my name, but without a Y.

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